The very words I used this weekend while watching the latest Hayden Christensen vehicle, Jumper.
Rachel Bilson is fine, I like her, and Samuel L Jackson can do anything and I'll watch. Which I proved when I watched Snakes On a Plane. That's a movie during which one does not ask what is going on, rather one asks, Why is this happening right in front of me?
But Jumper, true to its title, Jumped around from one subject to the next without ever actually finishing a thought. It was quite like teaching college in fact. He's here, he's there, he acquires a sidekick, he kills sidekick,(I think.)
Either the director didn't know how to finish a thought, or the writers (there were three of them, not counting the author of the book. Does THAT tell you anything?)weren't sure where to go from anywhere.
I think the idea was interesting, though it seemed very much like it had all been done before on tv with Jerry O'Connell. But in the movies the hero could do bad stuff too. Like rob banks at 15.
Christensen, Bilson, Jackson, et al, plundered through many many pages of whatever the fuck it was that they were doing, valiantly though. Diane Lane, a woman I loathe since she gets Josh Brolin regularly, worked for maybe a whole day on her two scenes. Just goes to show, if ya got good actors you can do anything.
Hayden could have disrobed a couple of times, THAT would at least have provided something interesting to look at. Besides three second clips of travelogue.
And if you think they were cold on top of Everest in Jumper, you should be here.
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