I can't imagine why.
Let's see, after acquiring shitloads of education I've spent the last 6, count 'em, 6 years looking for a full time teaching job.
I was privy to a communication I really shouldn't have been, and as soon as I heard it wished I hadn't been either. In reviewing my application for a job at a University where I am acquainted with someone who already works there I was informed that the person in charge of deciding who gets interviewed and who doesn't, that "I'm not interviewing this guy. With this resume he could get a job ANYWHERE."
Seems this is the consensus, but no one seems to get that THEY might be that anywhere and here I sit.
But this week I have meetings at the schools where I do teach, and yesterday I was at the community college. ho-hum. It was the same old drone they always deliver, and then they taught us the new registration and grading computer system, which didn't work correctly and many couldn't get access to. Not that that was all their fault. There was the dolt who interrupted the meeting to ask who he should talk to to get access to the system after being away for 6 years. (this was covered in the instruction book we were given) and then the people who couldn't figure out how to work pull-down menus. oy! I stepped outside because I was standing in the back of the room since there weren't enough computers to go around.
Today I have immense trepidation about this meeting of the "new" department I'm now a part of at the university that hired me a few weeks ago. The person "in charge" is someone I have a brief history with, who likely is not over our little confrontation of 20 years ago. So, since he came off a dolt, which he is, I'm wondering how he's going to handle our meeting.
I could be wrong, he could be completely professional, and not let on that it ever happened, he's not really the type, so I doubt it. I anticipate some underhanded thing designed to cause me headaches. They're paying adjunct money, they're getting adjunct hours...that's my position.
Also, it's coming to my attention that I'm being passed over for things I should be doing. After I was told the class I was slated to teach at the University was canceled due to lack of enrollment,then they hired someone to teach creative drama. (hello!) On top of which indignity I discovered that I was not asked to direct a show at the community college and someone I never heard of was asked to do it.
So, you see my conundrum.
My current position is somewhat Machiavellian. Take their money and their appointment and parlay it into a full time job elsewhere and shuffle off the petty coil of this town.
My gut says "kick somebody's ass" but that seems counterproductive. Besides at my age it'd take forever.
So we'll see what today brings. I've been asked to mentor a student in the honors program who has a project in scene design, oy, and though I've agreed I'm finding that the woman who initiated the contact with me is a bit of a pest. I'm meeting with them tomorrow.
I'm trying to convince myself that this is only a means to and end and if I'm patient I'll get at least a resemblance of what I want.
What I want is a little place in the country with a horse or two and a little place in the city (not necessarily this one) where I can retreat to when I need a little excitement. Is that too much to ask?
Oh! Sunday I refused to take a check at the grocery. There was a scene.
The woman in question whipped out a check for a $4.00 bill and proceeded to change absolutely everything ON the check except the signature. She changed the date, the amount, (adding $50 so she'd get cash back) and then changed who it was made out to. I watched her do this and said, "You're kidding me, right?" She had the nerve to not be amused. I told her I would not under any circumstances cash that check. She was a bold one and challenged me.
It was not lost on me that this is a store where people with influence and money trade so she'd likely get her way if she was the least bit blustery, and she did. The manager on duty cashed the check.
It was stolen.
I was asked about it yesterday, now the fight is on. They'd never try to make me pay the loss, they know I'd go batshit insane and they'd lose. They also know that I was smart in calling the manager over to ok the check. Which by the way wouldn't even go through the automated system. So they have little recourse except to ask me about it and then take my story to the woman who accepted a check I wouldn't.
So it seems that the only way to avoid conflict with people is to avoid THEM altogether. I'm increasingly inclined to withdraw and make pots and ride my horse. It's just not worth it.
Oh and the ex is out of town tending to his parents who are both very ill and I called to express my concern...nada, nothing, no response, no communication, nothing.
People are nothing if not disappointing.
Focus on success...focus on success...focus on success...
I need a morsel to start the day: (a little gin wouldn't hurt either)
Love
