Personally things could be going better. They're not catastrophic, but they're difficult. Mostly that's caused by being underemployed. But I'm still making it and that's what counts I guess. I still have a home and food and transportation that's not public.
I'm able to do all the things I love, make pots, speaking of which I have several that have to be trimmed this morning. I get to teach, which is going very well, even though the University is being, as I have noted many times, a bit um, well, ass-y about money. I ride my bike and the horse often, not daily, but I'm going to have to move for that. I'm healthy and I'm losing some of that weight I gained when I was flush with cash.
But something has shifted and I don't know why. My gait has slowed. Yesterday I was walking into the college to teach and I realized I wasn't click-click-clicking like I have in the more recent past. I was strolling. Don't really know why that is, but I seem to have mentally reached a point where I can stop running. Maybe it's taken this long to stop running from those who can't think of anything but themselves long enough to pursue me. Maybe I'm just feeling better. I don't know what it is but I like it.
But enough of the personal good luck inventory, I'm doing ok, things are getting rebuilt and they're changing shape, which I mostly like in this life, it's kinda fun to see things grow when they're not getting grotesque.
Five minutes after I wrote yesterday's post I ran across an article on cnn.com in which Bob Greene said almost the exact things I did. His analogy was two factions playing chicken in cars, but it amounted to the same thing.
But it was a day full of dichotomies. The Governor of Arizona, theocrat that she is,may she rot in hell, has removed all domestic partner benefits for state employees. She states that she believes that God put her in that job to do his work. Which, I suppose is to spread hate and mistrust wherever she goes, like a stain. I have to wonder if the day will come while I am living in which people are treated as humans just because they are one, not because they fit some mold someone else thinks they should fit.
And on the other hand the people of Queens elected TWO gay city council people. Queens! Not exactly a bastion of fairness and equality that place. Yet, there it is, their city reps are big ole mo's.
Katherine Hepburn, as Eleanor of Aquitane said, "There is everything in the world but hope."
I still have to wonder what our next civil war will be over. Will it be race, which is still very obviously a huge and ridiculous issue hanging over our heads. It's patently obvious by the complete lack of comedy about Barack Obama that everyone is afraid to be labeled a racist by making fun or parody of him. It's more and more obvious that there are legions of white people who are terrified by the fact that we have a black President, which I think is funny. George W. Bush was the closest thing we've had to Hitler in a long time and they weren't the least bit afraid of him. He could have easily destroyed us, and would have given enough time in office. But they never uttered a peep against him. Put a black guy in the Oval Office and they shit themselves. I'll never understand it.
Barack Obama, you must understand is no friend of mine, but it's ideological, not racism. He's once again used my fellow gay brothers and sisters to get elected. he went around telling everyone to be nice and tolerant, a phrase I sooo adore, and once elected set out on one hand to ignore us, and on the other to actually work to support the denial of our rights as citizens. So I don't love the guy, but he doesn't scare me because he's black.
But a civil war must be coming, I can't imagine that our citizenry will stand for much more change. Though as I look at things not much change has actually taken place. We still have no health care. We still have no real stimulus jobs that amount to much, we still have no new regs for the financial industry, we still have banks that are failing, we still have generally the same fucking mess we had in January when Beelzebub left office. SO exactly what change is it that's got all these fat white Christians up in arms?
I mean these dummies don't even know we Already HAVE term limits! How can one engage people in a reasonable discourse about what needs to be done in this country when they don't even know what the fuck is going on?
I love this woman, I defy her to tell me exactly what socialism is! She just knows that whatever is being given out, she's not gettin' any and she's mad about it cause the universe revolves around her.
But enough of them.
I'm at home, I'm enjoying the peace and quiet, I'm listening to David Darling play the cello, and I'm thinking of starting a fire this chilly gray morning, which is the first day of fall, I suddenly realize. I'm willing to bet that the turning of the pottery wheel will make me even more zen in a little while.
And so it goes:
Love
