The soul has greater need of the ideal than the real for it is by the real that we exist, it is by the ideal that we live

Friday, July 3, 2009

Da Nile

In an effort to deny my true self I am attempting to ignore the problem this morning.

I could really, and quickly get used to this waking up in the morning and meditating and doing Yoga for an hour thing.

The anticipated stress level isn't materializing, and that's surprising me. Cause I'm naturally...um...shall we say...wound a little tight.

But yesterday after doing the yoga thing I went for a three hour bike ride and then sat at the wheel and made a few pots.

Who is this man doing all these things? I should be pacing the apartment inventing scenarios of gloom and doom in which I become homeless and other devastating things befall me. Then in the evenings I should be drinking or getting high etc.

But none of this is happening! WTF???

Perhaps too early in the scenario. Perhaps just too damn old to find the strength to visit Armageddon daily. Perhaps old enough to know that no matter what happens I'll make it work. I have sooo been here before.

I will say that this mornings meditation was made even nicer by the steady rain that's been falling for hours. That and the great cello music I found while ripping all my cd's to the external hard drive. (I'm getting so many little chores out of the way I've been wanting to do forever, it's great)

In a while I think I'll clean up and drive over to Wal-Mart (yes I'm a Wal-Mart shopper again) and do a stock up run. Paper towels, Detergent, bounce, crap like that, which I know I'll need no matter what. In an effort to stave off even more Armageddon scenarios.

I do have a play I need to read...well actually three, so that may occupy some time for the next few days.

If it clears off a little this afternoon I may go for a bike ride. The apartment needs cleaning...and there's no one left to do it but me...waaaaaah!

Middle class was fun.

And I suddenly realize how pathetic this is...I've been so narcissistic-ly self-involved (I wonder where I learned that?) that I forgot HGF until this very minute!

Let's have a few DADT images in honor of Independence Day, shall we?






Have a wonderful and safe holiday weekend.

Love